Polar signs

We are nebulae painted in the arrogant imagination of the artistic astronomer.
We are stripes mitred into geometric puzzles by the enthusiastic textile designer.
We are the product of a god that is omnipresent yet anon.
We are the mellifluous violins in the rendition of Pachabel Canon.
We are the synaesthesia when astrology meets psylocybin.
You are a Uranian blue, I am a silver-green moon, we are arcing in a universal dustbin.
We are monochrome rainbows that masquerade as Mobius strips.
We are a trillion inches apart, yet when I close my eyes, it is not my own heartbeat that within me whips.

Happy Birthday my darling V.

I love you

I {chatoyance of a tiger eye} you
I {opening notes of Don't Think About Elephants} you
I {8 bit music meets a neon pixel dream} you
I {aurora borealis} you
I {bio-luminescent firefly} you
I {Anjuna} you
I {imli candy} you
I {TetraHydroCannabinol} you
I {sensory overload} you
I {B-complex supplements*} you
I {GoPro video} you







*with 75 mg Vit C per serving

Waste

He hid behind the mask
Of prosaic normality
When all that he wanted
Was verbose absurdity

The words flew in
The thoughts flew out
The backlash hurt
So he'd shoot up and lash out

Immature aspirations
Gilded his memories
Sharpening semicolons
Darkening apostrophes

He wanted to belch
All he did is breathe
The wave of opinion crashed
And so did he

Multiple Choice Questions

Dream I did of the safe happy life.
Joy unbound, no war and no strife.
Live it I did, for so many years.
Bored I did get, without the miasma of fears.

She asked me for more.
I suppressed the moan to a whimper.
I wanted to feel alive.
But chose to alienate her.

Complaints, restraints.
Laments, constraints.
I fought, I brought,
Shackled hate.

Can't take the ennui anymore.
Can't take the neural traffic jam.
Don't want to spend my old age.
Dreaming of marmalade while surviving on jam.

Sinew

She's not strong/She's ugly
She's fragile/She's manly
She's breakable/She's on steroids

You fight between beauty and brawn
You swing between pulchritude and prowess
You see-saw between sexy and strong

You are your source of dopamine
You are what you choose to tear and build
You are not what they expect you to be

Between mascara and machines
Between teapots and ketllebells
Between stilettos and supersets

Wield your weapons wisely
Test your talismans tentatively
Concuss your chassis consciously

Lovers and friends and opinions will come and go
External perceptions of beauty will mutate and ferment
Your internal compass is yours to tune, try and torture

Virgo niña

A friend is a sounding board
A friend shares your wanderlust
A friend hears your silence
A friend knows your soul

A friend is an outlier
In the statistical flatline of the masses
A friend is serendipity
In the random medley of chances

We don't choose the friends who walk into our life
We choose the ones that stay
We choose the ones who get to see
The best and worst of us every day

Happy birthday Lubaina. x

Night Meh

Night, quiet, quieter, quietest.
Air dense with empty calories.
The carbs attack, the blood boils.
Instant gratification, and more mobile notifications.
Queasy yet comfy, fluffy duvet meets cold floor.
And I slip into folds of chocolate emotion.
Murky, delicious, blinding stabs of brown.
Viscous beyond the strength of my arms.
I drown and gasp and swallow with joy.
Falling into familiar territory where the blues are black
And white fell off the colour spectrum eons ago.
The air is a mirror to your thoughts and there are spots everywhere.
No vacuum, just an void that is too thick for logic to penetrate.
And there I spot an army of me, almost me, just like me,
But cruel, evil and hell bent on destruction, of Vision, Mission.
Oh no, collision.
The strongest amongst them, I have seen before,
She loves sequels to her dramatic appearances.
She charges, twists, morphs, multiplies, smiles, dies, relives.
She cackles, tells me I am nothing, I am worthless, I am beautiful, I am broken.
I flail, I fall, I fly and I disappear.
I divide by zero, I multiply by infinity.
I learn the truth, i visualize the rogue patterns, I recognize the mythical beasts.
And I now know where I am.
This is no man's land, the divide between the souls of me, myself and I.
I face her again, I have nothing to lose.
The dagger that is my tooth is my weapon is my light is my star shining bright.
The negative voice, I stabbed and stabbed.
Tugged at her veins, blue, purple, green.
Oh no, she is dead, and so young.
I love my nightmares.

Perception

Your deadly voice and satiny laugh
I only love what I think you are.
You say you lie, you say you don't cheat
You know exactly what I think you are.
You've blown my mind with your chattery visions
You're a winner, at least, I think you are.
Your hugs, your drugs won't let me be
Got to go, you know exactly who you are.

Goody Two Shoes

He's so much trouble
Those rigid sorts
He'll kill you with
His pious thoughts

His crisp shirts
And his studious demeanour
You hate everything about
His spotless exterior

You want to destroy
His illustrious path
You want to laugh at him
And incur his wrath

But you don't know
What he does at night
Alone with his needles,
His knives and his plight

You don't know what the sleeves hide
You don't know what the poker face hides
You don't know what the textbook hides
You don't know what he openly hides

Whatever Works

She was friendly
He skulked in a day
She was a bitch
He stayed for a bit
And then walked away

She was earnest
He never noticed
She was a flake
He liked the games
And later, they were dissed.

She was attached
He said 'never'
She was detached
He came back
And was hooked forever.

Daisy's Dad

Let her go, she's just a child.
What did she do to deserve your bile?
Stop hitting her, you horrible man.
You're her guardian, not the bogeyman.

Let her go, she's one of our babies.
Her head is still filled with a million maybes.
Stop yelling at her, stop going crazy.
You're supposed to watch over our little Daisy.

Let her go, she's just turned five.
She's the only reason that I'm still alive.
Stop making her cry, stop eating her soul.
You make me ache with fear, I'll never be whole.

Let her go, or I'll kill you.
I'll take this knife and drive it through.
You're the worst thing that ever happened to me.
You're dead inside, you Devil's employee.

Formulae

A little bit of caffeine.
A lot more alcohol.
A tad bit of nicotine.
A lot of geraniol.

Now that's sex in a test-tube.

Our Plastic Romance

Cold winds.
Clammy hands.
Dark room.
Cheesy bands.

A new face.
A yummy entity.
Cuddles and fireplaces.
Non-sanctity.

Hard bound.
Let's dance.
Time to celebrate,
Our Plastic Romance.

Tissue Paper

You wiped your tears on her patient shirt
You drew strength from her gentle smile
And when you got what you came for
You ran so fast, five seconds a mile

She heard you rave and rant for hours
Spew bile and let all anger spill forth
She tried her best to help you let go
She made her heart and soul, your hearth

But when she needed you so near
So that she could stand strong again
You ate your sandwich and drank your beer
And said, 'Come on, you're faking that pain'.

And so she was alone in her misery
When all she needed from you was
Your patient shirt and your gentle smile
Your hand to hold, and not hers to pass.

Fade

It's a funny thing
This self esteem
It's easy to hurt
It's awesome to redeem

Your mediocre words
Don't matter anymore
Your daddy's money
Makes you a bore

I can't believe
I made you matter
More than others
When you're nothing but chatter

But it's going to change
Starting from now
You're demoted to nothingness
From up above

Have your weed
Kill your time
No productivity
Not worth a dime

Drown in your fears
While you hide your face
You're empty and dead
You're my best disgrace

I'll learn from your loss
I'll laugh at your pain
I'll feed on your mistakes
I'll make myself sane

You don't mean anything
You'll come as you go
Without a bang
And no one will know

Socialite

Busy as a bee
Smiling to me
She buries her displeasure
In the Adriatic sea

Air-kissing them
Some butch, some femme
She sighs to herself
So much to condemn

She wants more brandy
She feels so dandy
She's drawn to the plastic
Like a kid to candy

Duck-faced tweens who dream of fame
Look up to her and say her name
She wants it all but hates the path
She wants to cheat on a different game

Paradox

Don't love me.
I'll break your heart.
I'll always cheat.
I'll always outsmart.

Don't leave me.
It'll hurt too much.
Can't you see I care?
We always went dutch.

Don't call me.
You won't understand.
Don't believe me.
Reality isn't my land.

Polygon

She always wants him.
She now wants his friend.
She used to want his sister.
She begins to see a trend.

He's got the face.
She's got the charm.
He's got the money.
She rings the alarm.

Four way polygon.
Three-ways smart.
One part taboo.
Eyes, furtive, dart.

Shoot that whiskey.
Come upstairs.
Have some cake.
Don't forget the eclairs.

Let's hang out and smile.
And pretend it's all fine.
When the thoughts in our heads.
Explode like landmines.

Spasiba

Mommy's my comfort.
Mommy's my drive.
Mommy loves me.
Mommy's mine.

Mommy will protect.
Mommy will fight.
Mommy may cry.
But Mommy's always right.

Mommy, please smile.
Mommy, look ahead.
Mommy, I'll make you proud.
Wherever I head.

Girdles and Giggles

Squeeze, nip, tuck.
Pout, smile, cluck.
It's almost right.
It's almost night.

Feminine viles.
Glorious smiles.
Hourglass lies.
Times flies.

Power surge.
Abdominal urge.
Adrenalin peaks.
She speaks.

Fits like a glove.
Supports like love.
Wasp waist and satin.
Delicious like sin.

Jazziest curves.
Naughtiest swerves.
Push and shove.
Soft as a dove.

Tighter my dear.
I will not fear.
This pain is so sexy.
I feel so foxy.

Pull the strings.
Crumple these wings.
Bind me to perfection.
Hear my confession.

I want to be hurt.
I want to feel pert.
In this 35-21-35,
I feel the most alive.